I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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