so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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