I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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