I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
