Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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