I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
