i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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