Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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