Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
