Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...