Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize
