Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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