please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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