Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
