And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
