Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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