hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Is it because I queefed?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
