just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
