it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
