A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
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