and you said cock pushups were impossible
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize