Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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