i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
lol hangovers are for mortals.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
