Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
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Do I have a choice?
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WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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