I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
