I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
