o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
