we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
