i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
