He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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