with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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