It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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