I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize