i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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