Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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