I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
