That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
ok first of all what the fuck
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
