My nipple is on Facebook.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
