he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
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