Define "chronic" masturbator.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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