Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
