I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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