I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
