I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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