you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
i need some magic done to my vagina
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize