we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
He did a backflip because drugs
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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