marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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