In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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