If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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