Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
So. Much. Porn.
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