you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
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Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
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There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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